Change for yourself - NOT for anyone else!

Why do so many people choose to pick on people and criticize every little flaw? If you choose to do so, then don’t be surprised when you receive the same treatment! The critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. “Don’t be so fast to notice the smudge on your friends face while being oblivious of the blemishes on your own”. We need to look for the good in each other and enjoy the differences that make us unique. I have been doing research on human behavior and am finding out that one our biggest flaws is judging or comparing each other. One of the most successful gyms in my area grew tremendously by marketing “judgement free zone” and I am making it one of my goals this year to live that motto! Wouldn’t life be so much happier if we went through our days not worrying about what others think. Wouldn’t it be nice to do things for ourselves because we truly want the change that we are making, not what we think others expect of us. Well, it is easier said than done! 2012 is the year to do just that.


If you are trying to lose thirty pounds because you think others are going to be attracted to you then you might lose that weight but you might not have as much fun losing it because you should be losing it so you will feel better, be healthier, and want it for yourself! It must be for you and not anyone else. I have been changing my diet, eating more fresh fruits and vegetables and am noticing a difference in my mood from these changes and in the long run I will lose weight. I am doing it for myself. This year is about you; if you are happy, healthy, and wise then you will pass that along to your loved ones simply by being you! Enjoy the new year and work on your goals then pass the rewards on to others...

Let’s make 2012 the best year ever and let me know how you are doing. I love hearing from everyone who visits my blog, joins me on facebook, and reads my books. My email is kellerslifeinaweek@gmail.com

Recognize faults and let go (excerpt from my 2nd book)

Have you ever gone into a beautiful church with beautiful antique artifacts, pristine walls, and perfect paintings and then you sat in a pew only to notice a crack in the stained glass window? You realize you keep looking at the crack and wonder why that ugly crack hasn’t been fixed; the church has plenty of money to fix it. All of the magnificent beauty of this church is suddenly reduced to almost an insult to you and your time. I use this analogy to make the point that we do the same with people; have you ever seen a friend after five or ten years and the first thought in your mind is “wow, they have gotten old and obese.” Our thoughts naturally go toward the negative. this is taught to us even as children, and it is a habit most of us have because of repetition of these thoughts. After a few moments of talking with your old friend, you realize the person had three grown children now working in fields such as nursing, social work, and teaching. It is exciting to know this person has brought up three children who all chose careers that now help society to be a better place.

No person is perfect, we all have flaws and when we point out other people’s flaws, we are just distracting ourselves from our own. I have found jealousy will always turn into hate and low self-esteem which, often causes us to notice flaws and we tend to gossip about others in order to boost our own feelings. When you are around someone who is gossiping, it is always best to remain silent and not even nod your head in agreement, because this will only encourage this type of behavior.

A wise man once told me there is good and bad in everyone and just always try to illuminate the good. This may not be easy at times and it may take practice but it is a habit worth reaching for. Most experts agree, it takes two weeks of daily activity to form a habit, good or bad. A good exercise would be to pick the person closest to you and write down on a sheet of paper, all the things annoying you about this person. On a second sheet of paper, write all of the positive things about the person. The second part of this exercise will be much harder but really dig down deep and free-write without even thinking. Remember sitting in the church and constantly looking at that crack in the stained glass window and dwelling on the broken piece. So often, we polarize the broken parts of people and ignore or simply don’t even take the time to notice the good attributes. Remember, we are not perfect but, we should work to improve our faults; a good way to do this is to let those imperfections of our loved ones and ourselves go! Once you have completed the exercise, draw a big box around the page about the annoyances of the other person and then crinkle it up into a ball and throw it away forever! Hang onto the second part of the exercise and read it once a day for two weeks; you will see a difference in the relationship becoming healthier and a change in the way you look at everything about that person.

New year and new beginnings...

Here we are again with a perfect year to start fresh! The year is 2010 and the beginning of yet another great decade of learning, growing, and Loving. Every year I ask my family and friends “what is your new year’s resolution?” and get the same five or six responses. The most popular are to spend more time with the family, lose weight and get more fit, quit smoking, quit drinking, get rid of debt and be more organized. Then I hear the random ones of helping others more often, start volunteering, and learn something new. All are perfect resolutions and I am glad to see that we all put the effort into bettering ourselves and the world around us but, we will be discouraged if we don’t live up to these resolutions and in the long run (usually by February) will ultimately forget them.

Every day we meet new people and are in new situations that give us opportunity to learn something new and we may be surprised at the gems of wisdom that can affect us profoundly in our lives. We need to fully embrace the fact that it is essential that we acknowledge that everyone is valuable in their own way and is special. If we make a new years resolution to take an extra step in being a bit more compassionate, understanding, and kind to everyone we come into contact with, we will have the potential to enrich our lives in such a big way! All relationships whether brief or a lifelong friend can help us to open our eyes to new worlds of joy and happiness.

We need to remember that when we meet someone who we dislike or rub us the wrong way we still need to have that same compassion, while examining our own feelings carefully. Usually the reason that we may dislike someone who is different is because they compel us to question our own values and ideologies while threatening to undermine our self-assurance. We need to treat others how we would like to be treated, not how we are treated. If we treat a negative acting person with negative reactions, we are becoming that negative feeling. Our thoughts become who we are in our daily lives. Every action creates a reaction and we want to create a wonderful day for everyone we meet on our journeys in life. We need to start this new year with a positive attitude and spirit so we can work toward not only the best year of our lives but the best decade as well!

My point here is to start the new year with a new beginning and not just a new year’s resolution! We all make goals and work toward them on a daily basis, but what we may want to do are make changes to our thoughts as well. This in turn will help us on our way to reaching the resolution goals and to make us a bit happier while having a lot of fun along the way. Always remember that as long as we do better today than we did yesterday then we are heading down the right path in life. We all have the ability to make this a better world and should start with ourselves, our families, and our communities. Even the simplest gestures of a smile, holding the door open for the next person, or a quick wave can change the day and life of a stranger, so start embracing the beauty around us and make 2010 the best year of our lives!

Have a fun day,

Mike Keller

Patience

Sometimes we all take our friends and family for granted and forget to say "Thank you" and "I Love You." We sometimes don't realize how lucky and blessed we are until something changes, we need to be careful of what we wish for. Sometimes things that loved ones do can be annoying but, take a second to imagine not having those annoyances and imagine how boring life may get. Stop sweating the small stuff and start enjoying it instead, it will make for a better day. Oh yea, and never forget that we are not even close to being perfect and probably annoy someone as well!! So let's get outside and move our bodies and take in some fresh air with someone we care about.