Helping friends

I was asked today if I felt anger toward my friends who continued to have a few beers around me when I was in the beginning of becoming sober. I responded that I had no ill feelings toward anyone because I know they did the best that they could at the time and anger in our hearts only hurts ourselves. I felt that it was my battle that I was going through at the time and who am I to ask everyone around me to change their ways in order to make my life simpler. In fact, I felt more satisfaction as I made it through my daily journey with the temptations that surrounded me. It was my choice to be there in the first place and we don’t live in a perfect world.
I don’t think that we should judge one another for our mishaps and screw ups. I feel that we should try our best to help each other through the difficult times knowing that each one of us is blessed with free will. We can’t force our beliefs onto anyone and shouldn’t anyhow. When someone is ready for change, he or she will take the challenge and hopefully will ask for your help. I was also told that I should not try to help if this friend asked for it. Bologna! If someone has the strength to ask for your advice then this is the time to give it! You will always feel best when you know that you did everything that you could because you did. Walking away from someone who is struggling will only hurt everyone involved.

Let God do the judging, unless you are perfect. We all make mistakes and we all have issues so don’t pretend that you are perfect, but instead lend a helping hand anytime you can no matter the situation. True friends help each other without motives and that is what makes us friends.

Don't fear death

In the morning consider for a moment the fact that you may not live to see the sunset. When the sunset comes don’t be to confident that you will see the next morning. These thoughts should not make you feel gloomy or sad, but practical. We should live our lives as if it were our last day on earth. Most of us will die suddenly and unprepared. We think that we still have plenty of time and end up wasting valuable time. Death, with all of its uncertainties, is a fact. We need to face facts and see what could be done to better our lives and our surroundings now. Thinking about death will not cause death to happen sooner, nor will it help to escape it! The key is to live in such a way that no matter when death comes, it will find us in sanctifying grace.

Patience will help us in difficult times. It will help us to think more clearly. Humility will help us admit our weaknesses and therefore be less irritable or resentful in our difficult times. Sometimes we need to live through a storm to grow stronger. Life will have hardships and suffering but if you are brave and have faith in God you will find peace in your life and in the next. Many of us pursue an imaginary happiness with money or keeping busy. When we get what we want, we suddenly see that it doesn’t bring us the joy that we had expected. So we slowly begin to search for that happiness again and again. Don’t blame the place you are in or the people around you if you don’t have peace in your soul. Begin today to make a continual effort to strengthen the self love that is needed. Look for opportunities to practice patience, don’t fear suffering or inconvenience, virtues are never gained in easy times. We learn the most in difficult times. Life can be the happiest and most rewarding in these times, if we let it.

Bullies or Hate? Love is the answer!

When I was a kid we would have kids teasing each other about our hair, our teeth, or maybe even a smelly belly (fat) but, in these days of the internet and computers we are faced with many more issues. As we advance in technology and instant news we would hope that we would also become or “grow” smarter? Not the case in many aspects of our lives, in fact we may be going in the opposite direction. It is sad, today alone I read about a fourteen year old boy who committed suicide just fifty miles from my home because he was physically assaulted in the hallways of school every day for “acting gay”, a twelve year old girl who was severely beaten because she is Mexican, and a teacher who was fired because he yelled at a kid in his class to “pipe down or go to the principle!”

I think that the one thing we are lacking as a general population is “common sense and respect.” I respected my teachers because I was taught to respect my elders, I knew that I needed to listen to them or I would have to answer to my parents when I got home! I believe we need to start discussing these issues with our kids, co-workers, friends, and family. We need to set aside political correctness, stereotypes, and prejudgements of others. We need to lead by our examples and to embrace our differences in this great world of ours. Teach others by our examples, not just boring words that are forgotten...

We are blessed to live in a time of such changes and we need to learn from each other. We will fail if we don’t start paying attention to the world around us, but we will grow if we Love and nurture the good in each other. Talk to your family and friends about these issues and express yourself as only you can and we will make a difference today. Don’t try to change the world, just your world! Changes happen from within, then it spreads to others...

Daily Living...

We are bombarded by both good and bad energies on a daily basis. We try to stay strong and wear many masks and armor shielding to appear strong and brave in order to feel like a leader, instead of looking as if we are followers. We build walls around ourselves to feel safe and try to keep a distance from the evils that surround us. This may seem like a good idea but, we might not realize that we are also making it difficult for the good to get close too! Why are we so stubborn? Why is it that we accept and maybe even are expected to yell at someone who disagrees with our opinions or even the simple act of someone stepping on your shoe by accident? Why is it considered being weak if we are followers? These are all questions that I ask myself as I write in my daily journal and I try to seek the answers to in everyday life. The one fact that we all must face is that just as we are born we will all die and we will never know for certain when. Our bodies do not live for eternity and we are not invincible. Our bodies are a true work of art and we should love who we are because there is only one of us! We are born tiny little babies, nurtured to childhood, grow into adulthood, and hopefully will grow old. The fact that death is a fact of life poses an even more powerful question, why is it so difficult to discuss sickness and the final stages of life, which is death? I have seen the tallest walls ever built around us suddenly crumble down in the final moments of life with a simple touch of a hand, a hug, and by the simple act of showing love and forgiveness. As we go through life we love to carry extra baggage, hold grudges, and carry around anger in our own hearts which is only imprisoning us behind those thick walls of hate and anger. Forgiveness and Love will knock down those prison walls, so why wait until we are on our deathbeds to get the courage to do so. One of the best ways to enjoy life today is to realize that we are not promised to live until we are ninety or one hundred years old. We are not even promised the rest of today let alone tomorrow! Live today to your fullest, enjoy the changing colors that autumn season brings, smile and laugh, sing and hum, give a squeezing hug and don’t hold back! The most important thing is to never walk away from someone with a hurtful thought, only walk away when you know for sure that you just left that person feeling better than when you first walked up to him or her. Never forget that we all make mistakes and that we are only hurting ourselves when we walk around angry and ticked off at everyone around us!

HAVE FUN & ENJOY TODAY

We are only on this earth for a little while so we really need to make the best of our limited time. I often wonder how ready I am to enter into the next life? If today is my last day and tomorrow never comes who will remember me, who will miss me, but more importantly who have I helped to have a happier life? Is it true that when he is out of sight, he is quickly out of mind? What helps me to enjoy life every day may seem cold or even gloomy, but it helps to remind me that our time is limited so we really should make the most of it; In the morning I consider for a moment the fact that I may not live till the evening. By living this way death will never take me by surprise and I will never have to move onto the next stage with unfinished business here on earth. These thoughts remind me never to go to bed arguing with a loved one, not to be rude to anyone, to say thank you more often, to help others and to never get greedy. Death is a fact of life that is a certainty and when we face that fact we will live a much happier life. Each night as you lay your head on your pillow and think about the day that had just past and you can you can smile and know that you did the best that you could and can be satisfied by the events of the day, then you should be happy to be where you are. When you have problems don’t try to tackle them in one day, just chip away a little piece at a time so that you won’t waste the entire day in that homemade stress, trust me when I say “It doesn’t even matter, just be happy.” Sometimes we are in places in life where we think “the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.” I often wonder what people are thinking, I can sit on a bench at the casino or at the beach and watch people walk by and wonder by the expressions on their faces what they are thinking and where they are.I wonder if they know how lucky they are to be in such a great setting, maybe with their friends and family or even just a little getaway for the moment. By sitting back and people watching for a few minutes I realize that I too have it good and that I am in a good place. If we know where we are in life we will make our own destinies by our thoughts and habits; then we will be able to decide which paths in life to take and in turn better our lives while we are here. While sitting back on that bench at the beach yesterday I noticed that a dog kept returning to its own vomit and I wondered why and realized that we do the same thing when we stress out on issues that don’t even matter.